Your new post is loading...
The Diabetes 2 Reverser PDF ebook by Mark Manning free download. Is this real life or a wonderful dream that I never want to wake from? I ask this question daily when I look at my son. He truly amazes me. Everything about him is perfect. He’s already such a strong little guy. The day I found out I was pregnant tops any feeling I’ve ever felt. I’ve wanted to be a mommy since I was a little girl, I couldn’t wait to have my own little one. Now that I have my baby boy my biggest dream has come true. As I got older, I often wondered if I would be able to have kids because of my diabetes. I felt like the internal damage this disease causes might’ve made it impossible. Plus the risks involved I was almost certain pregnancy wasn’t in my future. When I found out I was pregnant my entire life changed. Excitement, fear and love immediately filled my heart. I’ll admit I didn’t take care of myself like I should’ve pre-pregnancy but the second I knew my little dude was in there I tightened up on my diabetes and was able to decrease my blood sugar tremendously. I even did something I never thought I would, I got a “robot part” (this is what I call any external device that I wear for my diabetes). I immediately got a dexcom, a continuous blood glucose monitoring system and it literally made my pregnancy so much easier. I decided against a pump this pregnancy mainly because they still seem scary to me and I truly don’t mind taking shots whether its .5 units or 20 units the prick is all the same. After lots of back and forth about it and talking with my husband we decided if another little is in our future a pump will be also. My pregnancy would’ve been considered “normal” if diabetes wasn’t lurking around inside my body like an annoying parasite. I did have more than the average doctor appointments but that meant more ultrasounds which meant seeing my little love double possibly triple the amount of “normal” times. (I keep putting quotations around “normal” because I’m not sure exactly what it means. I’m almost certain its a fictional word used to describe things that are boring…monotonous…bland…basically anything without sparkle). I had to go to a specialist that did level 2 ultrasounds (still have no idea what this means) but they are awesome. I also went to a pediatric cardiologist, the fact they can see the baby’s heart in the womb is mind blowing. I was pretty much all belly until the last month of my pregnancy. Imagine a can of biscuits…now imagine that same can once you take the wrapper off and it pops…dough coming out of the seams is a pretty accurate visual of me in pretty much everything I tried to wear, including my flip-flops. Doctors probably caused me more stress than needed during the time my dude was baking. Things I heard “the baby is bigger because of your diabetes” (um..what? my A1c is at a 6…) “your baby will be born with lung disease and low blood sugar and for sure will need to be in the NICU” (baby boy didn’t even get a glimpse of the inside of the NICU nor did he have low blood sugar although he did have to be monitored the first 12 hours of his life) “you need to have him early which will increase his chance of lung disease or you can wait which will increase the chance of stillbirth” (I was ready that day to get my baby out, I would rather risk lung disease than stillbirth because this is was not an option for me) “you’re baby is around 9.13 pounds” (pretty accurate my guy was 10.5) and one of my favorites..”are you sure you’re a type 1 diabetic?” (……wow….hmm…well…I’ve been taking insulin shots, suffering from both hypo and hyperglycemia and multiple finger pricks a day for 15 years plus a diagnosis from more than one doctor so I’m pretty sure and if not someone’s got some splanin to do). I could keep going but even now I feel my blood pressure rising with annoyance. After multiple appointments, scary words spoken by the doctor, stressing, crying, being so strict on myself with my diabetes management and setting a date, the day finally came to have my little guy. This was the best day of my life…seriously nothing will ever top the feeling of hearing his cry for the first time. It was a sound I dreamed about. Crazy? maybe but it was the sweetest sound I’ve ever heard. All the stress, worry and fear I had melted away and then…I saw his face and my heart has never felt the same since. I don’t really know if love truly explains this feeling I have. I could try and try to explain it but I don’t think there’s just one word for the feeling. Unconditional, unimaginable, breathtaking, selfless love is the closest I can get. I don’t know, maybe its the low blood sugar I treated before beginning this post or maybe its the postpartum but I cry almost daily not because I’m sad but because my heart is so filled with joy and happiness that it is so overwhelming I feel like sometimes I may explode. I tell my husband all the time “I can’t believe he’s here.” “Is this real life right now?” I sure hope it is and if not I pray I stay in this dream for the rest of my time.
